So I was out this weekend with some people having a few pops when, for some reason unknown to me, my friend Matt and I found ourselves in an interesting conversation. After a short time, we determined that the difference between hippies and rednecks comes down to three things: guns, drugs, and recycling. I’m not entirely sure what brought about this discussion but it’s a simple equation and it goes a little something like this.
First, I should point out that while Matt hugs his fair share of trees he is by no means a hippie and definitely doesn’t drive a gas guzzling pick-up. Similarly, I enjoy drinking PBR but can’t stand the smell of patchouli. It’s also important to note that I’m going to generalize our findings because I clearly haven’t had the time to perform any scientific research to quantify or support these results. After all, I’m no academian. So here’s really all you need to know.
Hippies, for the most part, don’t care for guns. They are pacifists and violence of any kind just doesn’t sit well. Besides, with all the Birkenstocks and peasant skirts they aren’t really suited for anything but sitting around in fields of daises playing guitars and smoking hookahs. Rednecks, on the other hand, are crazy about their guns and can’t get enough of them. They also don’t miss many opportunities to hone their shooting skills. This is evidenced by the various road signs peppered with buckshot or the obligatory beer cans riddled with holes.
Next we’ll look at the drugs. This is a little tricky because hippies and rednecks seem to both have an affinity for drugs. The main difference here is the type of drug. Hippies prefer theirs grown by Mother Nature (or someone with better hydroponics) and rednecks like theirs concocted with enough chemicals to fill a bathtub (and that’s usually where it’s mixed). Also, the drugs hippies like tend to make you sleepy (from what I’ve heard) while the redneck’s drugs keep you up for days on end.
The last difference between hippies and rednecks comes down to recycling. Hippies are big fans of reusing or repurposing items so that nothing is wasted and only like to use products that can breakdown and return to the earth. They’ll compost and separate glass from plastic and grow their own food free of chemicals (but loaded with bugs). They’ll spend piles of money to have the earth friendly bio-diesel car while walking around in hand-made pants. Rednecks just throw stuff out the window of their truck or let trash “accidently” fall out the back of their pick-up truck and wait for the hippies to clean it up for them.
First, I should point out that while Matt hugs his fair share of trees he is by no means a hippie and definitely doesn’t drive a gas guzzling pick-up. Similarly, I enjoy drinking PBR but can’t stand the smell of patchouli. It’s also important to note that I’m going to generalize our findings because I clearly haven’t had the time to perform any scientific research to quantify or support these results. After all, I’m no academian. So here’s really all you need to know.
Hippies, for the most part, don’t care for guns. They are pacifists and violence of any kind just doesn’t sit well. Besides, with all the Birkenstocks and peasant skirts they aren’t really suited for anything but sitting around in fields of daises playing guitars and smoking hookahs. Rednecks, on the other hand, are crazy about their guns and can’t get enough of them. They also don’t miss many opportunities to hone their shooting skills. This is evidenced by the various road signs peppered with buckshot or the obligatory beer cans riddled with holes.
Next we’ll look at the drugs. This is a little tricky because hippies and rednecks seem to both have an affinity for drugs. The main difference here is the type of drug. Hippies prefer theirs grown by Mother Nature (or someone with better hydroponics) and rednecks like theirs concocted with enough chemicals to fill a bathtub (and that’s usually where it’s mixed). Also, the drugs hippies like tend to make you sleepy (from what I’ve heard) while the redneck’s drugs keep you up for days on end.
The last difference between hippies and rednecks comes down to recycling. Hippies are big fans of reusing or repurposing items so that nothing is wasted and only like to use products that can breakdown and return to the earth. They’ll compost and separate glass from plastic and grow their own food free of chemicals (but loaded with bugs). They’ll spend piles of money to have the earth friendly bio-diesel car while walking around in hand-made pants. Rednecks just throw stuff out the window of their truck or let trash “accidently” fall out the back of their pick-up truck and wait for the hippies to clean it up for them.
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2 comments:
guess what there are more of in Georgia... I will give you two guesses.
Long live hippies.
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